I usually don't say anything serious about my work. It has no place here. What I do talk about is generic happenings that could take place in any Company - or, at least, that's what I like to think.
This post is almost as generic as any other but there are some things I'm too lazy/not in the mood to abstract.
Here it goes:
A few days ago I've met with a colleague that has left the Company I'm currently working at. His reasons for leaving were that he didn't learn enough and didn't develop as a professional.
Now he seems very pleased about the new workplace and he praised it constantly: from the work done, the professional quality of the people he's working with to the way standard procedures are executed there - with out most perfection if anyone had doubts.
Me...well, I did mention to him that now I'm in a bit of a dead season: the project has just been delivered, there's not much feedback and nothing major/urgent requiring fixing so I'm just spending my days resting after a few very busy months.
He then asked me what am I still waiting for, why am I not leaving the place that apparently rots my brains and kills my oh-so-hungry-for-knowledge spirit, so I answered that I'm waiting for the project to be complete, to have something palpable at the end, to feel that maybe I have not wasted all this time. Plus, working on publicly available projects it gives the chance to use this as neat future reference, to show something that has gone live and people use every day.
To this he answered: bullshit, this doesn't matter! So what if I managed to deliver a functional public product? This means nothing! (1)
Moving forward today, at work, I've received an e-mail informing me that the product we delivered has been given an award for excellence in blah blah blah (what the product does).
Yeah, sure, I work in a very corporate company. This might not be a big deal for foreign people, but for us, the ones that have worked in several firms in Romania, we know not many companies have this kind of environment and attitude.
For example, my company is very keen on obtaining numerous quality, security, what not certifications. It is important for them to be acknowledged by a third party because their public profile is very important.
This may not seem a big deal but it so happens in the field this company operates it is very important.
And not only...I mean, I'm guessing it matters to all of us for the majority of things, products, processes to follow a standard, to have a minimum quality, something somehow tangible, that could assure us that whatever it is we're using/doing will give out the results we expect it to give.
Of course this award does nothing for me. It doesn't even impress me. I've worked on this product, I know it is far from perfect...but the thing is: someone was happy with it. Someone was satisfied. And it so happens that someone was the user, the target that product was meant for.
I mean: what else could there be said?
Of course, going back to no. (1), from a technical point of view, this award is zero.
From the perspective of anyone looking to hire me, looking at my technical abilities, this doesn't say anything. It is not something tangible. (Not as tangible as me knowing by heart the whatever API and whatever design pattern and whatever new technology principles).
Because I don't work with image, I work to build the image and only my skills to lay one brick at a time, in the right place, the right kind of brick, matter.
On the other hand I know there is a difference between what the developer thinks the user wants and what the user really wants.
And sometimes technology and fancy design and all that mean exactly zero, because if
the header is not the right shade of green,
the enter key doesn't change focus on the next field instead of submitting the form
the language list is not filtered after a weird no sense algorithm,
the user is not explicitly forbidden to click a button even if by any logic it would make no sense for him to click it
and so on... (I'm sure you know what I'm talking about).
the end product is not a good product. It does not deliver.
Back to my not so much internal but now public struggle: should I not be proud?
Not even a bit?
Do all the hours spent fixing idiotic and, indeed, the-least-satisfying-for-my-knowledge-thirsty-brain issues mean nothing?
Is everyone's work filled with satisfaction at every breath but mine?
Is everything I do useless but everybody else is involved in mind blowing projects?
What the fuck?!
I mean, I know I've ignored my career path. Actually I still do. I don't give a shit about it.
All the exams, the hours to be spent studying just to add a new diploma in my resume ...what for? Am I being realistic thinking that in 90% of the companies this things don't matter? Or am I being stupid, an ignorant fool?
Maybe it's just in my company that this happens. Maybe in all the other places people are really put to good use. They get to learn and then apply the latest fancy shmacy shit in the field. They're pioneers, they're avant-garde ...they're satisfied? Really, truly, completely satisfied.
When they go to work they go because they wish to work, they're enthusiastic about every little task and it is a real pleasure for them to be in that place for 8 to 9 to maybe 10 (who would want to leave at the bell ring when you're having so.much.fun!) hours. They have spare time activities that contribute to their growth as a professional. They're achievements are acknowledged in a circle of academic and competent field experts.
Compared to them, I am...what?
I'm not even allowed to be proud. That's what I am :(
